Content Free Changework is Actually Possible!
I was asked to do a demonstration of a New Code technique the other day by a very cynical woman who (not kidding here!) did not
believe people could change. I told her that I could not only demonstrate that change is possible, but that I would increase the challenge of the task by doing the changework content free! Another woman happened to be in attendance, and I asked her to be my demo subject, since she was very expressive.
I’ll call the woman who didn’t believe in change Rainbow Bright. I decided to walk the expressive lady through a nifty little technique that’s usually called “stalking the problem,” and I asked her to pick a problem she was having that currently had her stuck. She thought about it, decided on one, and nodded. I asked her to step fully and completely into the problem, seeing what she sees, feeling what she feels, and to simply be in the problem for a time. When she did that, I asked Rainbow Bright to take a mental snapshot of how Expressive Lady looked when she was having the problem. I told Expressive Lady to NOT tell me what the problem was, we would simply refer to it as “The Problem.” (dum dum dummmmmmm)
After taking her through the technique, I had her think of the problem again and it was totally busted. Not only could she NOT get back the state of “The Problem” (dum dum dummmm), but she actually smiled a little when she thought about it. It was over. Gone. Done away with. And all without her telling me ONE PIECE of content that the problem contained. Rainbow Bright, cynical as she was, had to admit that she had seen a change, a point I used as leverage with her over the next couple of weeks to get her to expand her view of both the world and herself.
Now, that might seem like the end of the story, but it actually wasn’t. A few weeks later, Expressive Lady casually asked if I remembered the technique I’d done with her, and of course I did. She told me that she discovered there were actually two changes in her life as a result from that one technique. It turned out, there was another area in her life that she did not realize it consciously, but it closely paralleled the problem (dum dum dummmmm) we actually worked on. Somehow, this other problem fixed itself, seemingly on its own, while she thought she was merely working on the one issue. She’d gotten a two-fer!
A year later, I was talking to a fully licensed counselor and she told me something interesting. She said that “content free” changework stands as an impossible holy grail for counseling, an ideal to strive towards because there are certain counselors out there (not all, apparently, but some) who consider that the more advice you give a client, the less ethical you are. That is obviously a contested position, but she was visibly impressed with the story of Rainbow Bright and The Expressive Lady, stating I’d done something she hadn’t even known was possible.
Wanna know a secret? I’m not a counselor. I’m not a therapist. I have no moral objection to giving advice–frequently it’s what people pay me to do. But I also like that, if and when I need to, I can help a person change their reaction to one or more problems, whether to merely feel differently about it or even to reacting more flexibly, without having to go through every detail of it. That just takes up more time and, obviously, isn’t needed. I greatly prefer teaching people how to have more tools, and more useful ones, when they go out there to take on the world!
If you’d like someone from Bright Mind to help you get more in control in a way that’s useful of a problem you have, feel free to contact us. We’d be glad to roll up our sleeves and show you what we can do!